Research and Development

For the first time, I had fun going far places to research. The summer camp has started and we already spent a night at school. In here, we were divided into groups and then we’d create animated short films and we had to do it in just 2 months.

Part of developing a story is researching all about it. So our group went to go a 2 hour-ride all the way to Buhi because that’s where the story was about.

We spent the whole afternoon circling the famous lake and all the places we passed by were marvelous.

6

Part of my plan on going to Buhi was to have a sketchwalk. At first it was really fun because the place was inspiring but later on, because of the heat and the hike we were on, there was just too many things to do and I was not in the state of wanting to sit and draw.

5

Maybe, next time.

10

I can’t find a good photo but I just have to say that reaching the rock we were sitting at was not easy. We had to climb rock formations. And it was not just a tiring task, it was also really scary because some of the rocks there were really steep and at first glance you’d think that climbing it was impossible unless you’re spiderman.

3

Then again, maybe at that moment, we became spiderman. Plus, we had these two kids who guided us on where to step and where to go.

4

We were all exhausted but the day has not yet ended. We went to the docks and rented a boat that would take us to the other side of the lake. The lake was really massive so the ride took like 10 mins.

3

Also, this is my trying-to-look-excited-but-really-terrified-because-oh-my-god-this-boat-is-so-uncontrollable-and-any-moment-now-we-could-all-go-struggling-for-dear-life-in-the-water. Kinda like that.

1

I am not really a big fan of boat riding. It gives me anxiety because if you haven’t noticed it yet, the boat is a really sensitive mode of transportation. The slightest movement of your body causes it rock and tilt and almost throw out and what the fuck.

2

But I survived. We reached the other side but we had to walk for like 20mins to reach the twin waterfalls. I can hear my feet screaming at me every step I take.

6

I wasn’t able to see this up close because I don’t want my pants to get wet.

9

Alas, the water reached my knees so you got what happened. After that we went to a really nice place by the lake. We talked about politics in these ruins.

8

And then we ate in a place not far from there.

7

And then we went home. My body is still aching up until now but it sure was fun.

God I hope this film is a success. Photos are not mine.

The Purely Written Medium

Daily Post: It’s a Text, Text, Text, Text World

“Let’s talk about this in person.”

Probably it’s because it’s more convenient to talk in person without typing shit and all that but can’t we talk here? Right now? I mean, don’t you think that it reduces the excitement and the burst of emotions if we still wait for another day that we can personally meet and talk about it? Think about it, there is a correlation between the length of time before you talk about a juicy subject and the intensity of wanting to talk about it.

It might not be true to everyone, but in my experience of real talks and late-night conversations it’s not arguable.

But in my world, the people I’ve talked to usually prefer talking in person because according to them, it’s easier to say the things that they wanted to say. That’s why, I think, they risk that perfect moment for a good conversation and save it for another day when they can tell me in person. And that is how they reach out to me.

Well, I think that I have a different view regarding this situation. You see, I tend to talk more in online messages than in real life. I don’t know if it’s because chatting requires a lot of activities like typing and thinking and revising some shit if it sounds off or because I’m just too awkward to say something to someone after a long shit I just heard from them in person.

To be honest, I prefer the written medium when it comes to reaching out because I can organize what I needed to say. I’m more confident and the face of who you’re talking to doesn’t distract you. Plus, I don’t need to panic and it’s gives me time to think what I really want to say. I still think it’s as genuine as it is when you personally say it even if it’s been edited out because I know that it came from my heart and that’s how exactly I want to say it.

Lonely Hearts

yahari-ore-no-seishun-love-come-wa-machigatteiru-07-00

I was never at all interested at this anime the first time I saw the art style. I was never a fan of unrealistic hairstyles and really big eyes with too much light reflected on it. Their school uniform looked really uninviting and I thought they were students of a magic school and I thought the plot was all about student adventures but with powers where they kill off shit and I am not ready for that kind of anime.

When I asked for my friend to give me a good, light-hearted anime, I did not really understand why he’d given me this and told me that this is his favorite. Compared to the past animes I’ve watched (I was about to enumerate them but then I had trouble remembering the titles because damn those titles are long), this one looked pretty dark.

But as first impressions would have it, I was, again, wrong.

I’ve come to love the main characters because of their bizzare and intriguing yet realistic commentaries on the society. This show opened the doors for the audience to the themes that are rarely talked about like the isolation oneself in a group when everyone thinks that we all belong. They represent all the loners out there who have a different way of conquering the battlefield of socializing. It might be depressing but that’s how it is and that is how they have survived life.

To be honest, I relate so much on them (seriously, I do). There was a point in my life where I felt the suffocating feeling of loneliness despite being inside a circle of friends. I can’t say that they were horrible friends because they were nicest friends you can have especially when you’ve been alone for quite a while. And yet, I felt like I was in a different environment and it was so hard to adjust that it came to the point where I almost don’t feel like going to school.

I never talked to anyone about that situation afraid of making everyone think that I was ungrateful and that I chose people too much. And I think what everyone doesn’t understand is that sometimes, when it comes to the idea of belonging somewhere, it’s not really about having friends. And it’s sad that they keep forcing loners to make friends when the truth is they don’t really feel like it.

The media has always portrayed that surrounding yourself to people is the happiest thing to do. But sometimes you just feel like staring off to distance and just minding your own business. I don’t experience that kind of situation anymore especially now that I have proper friends but looking back at that, I know that there are people who still feels that way. And all I’ve got to say to them is fuck those people who says what’s best for you and do shit your own way.

I know that whatever that way is, it might not even work, but you know mistake’s good. God, I suck at giving advice.

Anyway, I got carried away again, I almost forgot I was reviewing a show. Going back, there may be unnecessary characters and some things that were left ambiguous (like the fact that they didn’t talk about that fateful accident) but you know, I think that there are things in the universe that must be left unanswered so I’m satisfied, I guess.

The teacher’s (I forgot her name) character was funny and I like the running gag about her age and how she’s single and all that. I can continue talking about the characters but I seriously forgot their names and I’m too lazy to look it up.

But y’all should watch it just to give y’all different perspective.

From Puke and Headache

I never had the chance to say something of sense because last night everything was really fuzzy and weird and my thoughts didn’t match my words anymore. So I guess this is where I should organize everything I wanted to say before you embark your journey towards pure adulthood.

1.

That guy is an asshole. He’s not worth your time plus you don’t deserve to be treated like you’re some disposable thing that he gets mad at whenever you fail to function. You are a precious human being who deserves someone who will treat you with respect and with great love. I have no idea when that person is going to come to your life but for now, you have a great big future ahead of you and that is something we can all look forward to. You surpassed the sleepless hours of work and the torturous anticipation of grades and I salute you for that.

2.

Your honesty with your feelings is something I admire about you alongside your achievements. Despite my words of bitterness and everyday distress against your relationship, I can’t help but feel protective over the both of you. You’re the reality that I will never have. You’re the everyday daydreams and the things the could have been but never were. Just because there are things in my life that can never be, that doesn’t mean that yours will be as cold and as hopeless. That’s why, I want you to know that I’ll always have your back. Both of you.

And right now, as I start to drift off to sleep because of the shitty hangover I had from last night in this very room where, for the first time, I poured everything out without fear or second thoughts to the few people I trust most, I start to wake up from the fantasy I’ve been living in for the past couple of months.

Thank you and goodluck.

It’s All Written On My Hand

I stare at my grade in Animation 3 that was personally written on my right hand by our professor. Right now, It’s barely recognizable because it was smeared with the sweat manufactured by my hands because of anxiety that has progressed for the past days (just awhile ago, it was unstoppable). Also, my hand was shaking while he was writing it down awhile ago.

We’ve been staying over my friend’s place for the past week just so we could finish our final requirement. We faced a lot of different possible situations in which we thought we would fail. Just like the part where we passed beyond the deadline and it was technically unacceptable but we were lucky enough to be given a chance. And even though our grade in our finals is 65 (yep, that was the harsh lesson we got when it comes to meeting deadlines), we survived this semester.

And I just want to say that the feeling of one semester is equivalent to a year. That’s why, an end of a school year is a big of a deal because of a LOT of growth and character development happened in there for everyone. In fact, I’ve had a few mind blowing revelations I recently found out from my friends.

I have a week to take some rest. Make up for all the hours I forced myself not to doze off. And then after that, Summer Camp. I still have no idea how crazy things are going to get but for now, I just need some time to reboot.

I was about to say, that I missed my bed and stuff like that and then I realized, My mom bought a new bed because the old one felt like we lived in a stable. So right now, I shall experience for the first time sleeping in an actual bed. Which is the best reward I ever had from all of these. My mom really understands my needs.

Life’s little pleasures.

20919_1040071642686897_5077709472747689636_n