Weekends at Cinema 5

Yep, back from Manila again because of the Animahenasyon 2015 Awards Night and a Storyboard & Animation Master Class by director Christian de Vita. And can I just talk first about the shitty hotel we stayed in.

First off, it smelled like cigarette smoke. Now, I have nothing against smoking except when someone does it inside a closed room that is air conditioned. What the fuck is wrong with you? Second, there is a reason why a mirror is attached to the ceiling. Besides from taking selfies. Third, in addition to that “reason”, the shower room is fucking transparent. Well it’s tinted in a dark color but you can still see what you don’t really want to see in there! And it’s so awkward to take a bath even though you’ve closed the lights and you are so sure that your roommate is still dead asleep.

Clearly it’s not the typical hotel room you would check into. Ew, god knows what stuff happened in that room, I don’t even wanna know.


Well anyway, our school won most of the awards in the Animahenasyon 2015 which is enough for me to enjoy our trip even though I didn’t win in my categories. I guess it’s because we all have a full understanding of what it’s like to work really hard on an animated short film. I mean, whether it turned out to be a crappy or awesome output, we all know that doing it is never easy. Which is why I am just really happy for my friends who won in the awards night.

We also had the privilege of attending a workshop about storyboard and animation by Christian de Vita who was the storyboard artist for Fantastic Mr. Fox and Frankenweenie. His talk was really funny and informative especially when he gave details about filming techniques that is useful for making effective storyboards.  Plus we also get to have free popcorn and drinks while watching the screening of his new film Yellowbird starring Seth Green and Dakota Fanning.


But I guess the highlight of all happened the night after the awarding and we were celebrating at some bar where we met some alumni of our school.  It was a short conversation I had with my professor but it sure meant a lot and I still have the feels everytime I think about it.

So while we were drinking, he suddenly brought up the thing he told me two years ago when I was starting in 3D animation. He told me that the students who came from our town (because we lived in the same town) were all great in the field and that I had to be great as well. It was such a pressure for me back then because wtf I was young student who doesn’t have a clue on 3D and I had to live up to that…legacy.

And here we are, two years after that talk. When he suddenly told me that I lived up to that. Along with another student who was also from the same town. We both did it. And it was such a big deal for me because it’s not everyday you get to hear that from your professor. Throughout the years we’ve known him for being really strict about deadlines and making snappy comments about our works so that we could improve. And hearing something as big as this left me speechless and awkward and I didn’t know what to say. AAARGH. It felt like winning an award or something.

Actually it feels bigger than that because he’s known me from the very beginning. And I guess he’s got quite a view of each student’s growth and evolution to where they are now. That is why he’s the most legit person who has the say on how we’re doing on our progress.

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Sad Stories

Ever seen someone and then cringe because of how greatly that person has affected your life but then you turned out to be these two people pretending to not know each other for some reason.

The moment that person steps on the scene, you do your best to act like you do not care. You start talking to everyone else and you find ways to be as busy as you can.

But then there are those inevitable moments when you will have to acknowledge each other. And so you will have to do it with empty eyes and blank expressions and minimal gestures.

You must not show weakness. You must hide the longings and cover up the sorrows. Exchange awkward glances and awkward comments. Breath in and out awkwardness until the whole ordeal is through.

No one wins, though. At the end of the day it would always feel like you’ve been punched in the face.

Repeat until fade.

That 7-year old Vocation

When I was a kid, I remember watching this documentary on National Geographic about Shaolin Kung Fu. I was almost sure of wanting to pursue becoming a Shaolin Monk. I don’t even know how would I even reach China but I was willing to shave my head and turn away from meat. Heck, I even gave enough thought on disguising myself as a boy (not even realizing that soon enough puberty is gonna strike).

I remember trying out one of the exercises of this martial art where you punch a pail of water repeatedly for like an hour or two. And I remember doing that in the bathroom hoping that, with sheer determination, I could achieve my dream of becoming a Shaolin Monk. Then I also remember my mom pinching me on the side and giving me economy and conservation lessons.

And that was how the untimely death of my dream happened. The end.

Failed Meet-Ups

I guess it wouldn’t hurt to write one more entry. I mean, it’s been weeks since I last updated this shit. Now, I am not here to discuss any more political or literary subjects. I’m just gonna rant about something that has happened to me quite a lot. Awhile ago it happened to me again, so I realized I’ve had enough of this fuckery.

Okay, so if you decided to meet up with a friend, especially someone you haven’t seen in a long while, do not blow that meet-up by changing plans at the last minute. No, you are not allowed to forget that you have a scheduled reunion. You are not even allowed to let your mind skip and casually leave your friend waiting at your agreed meet-up place. You are not allowed to be late for…I don’t know, an hour. And most importantly, you’re even allowed to not show up.

And fuck you for saying I’m being a clingy friend because you know why?

That slightest change of mind probably broke your friend’s heart into a million pieces. No, you didn’t just break her heart. You pulverized it into dust and blew it straight to her eyes which caused tears to fall down her sorry-ass face.

You don’t know how excited she feels on these rare meet-ups. How she is willing to cancel everything out just to spend time with you. It’s sucky because the moment you say sorry about it, she’s not allowed to say anything else aside from “It’s okay, maybe next time,”. Because if she did complain and say what she feels, it’s gonna backfire to her when she gets named as the clingy friend.

And no one wants to be that annoying friend who is known for being possessive and obsessed and needy.

But she’s not being clingy. Give some thought to it. She just cares to the people that are important to her.

Yeah She’s A Mary Sue, but SO WHAT?

So I was looking over the internet about feminism, when I stumble upon a term called Mary Sue. Apparently it is a name you describe a female character from a fictional story who is overly idealistic and without flaw. It is deemed to be annoying because she is too perfect and there is no more room for character development.

And there’s one character that first popped in my head after reading about it–Nancy Drew. I didn’t mean to think about her but I did and for a moment I felt like my childhood has been ruined. Like all the things that I believed in was nothing but false principles. And I couldn’t accept that my childhood hero is a weak and annoyingly perfect character.

She’s beautiful. She’s obviously smart. She’s reliable. She has acquired early independence ever since her mother died when she was younger. That leaves her with a really hot lawyer dad and has a lot of professional connections. She has best friends who happen to be awesome sidekicks. She’s sociable. She has a handsome and extremely athletic boyfriend despite having so many cases to work on. She owns a blue convertible that she drives really badass. She has traveling privileges to far-away locations. She never run out of money. And all those random and unnecessary and useless information that she had suddenly becomes an important fact whenever there’s a problem to be solved.

But WAIT. There’s more. I’ll leave Wikipedia to tell you what else you don’t know.


*sigh* She’s definitely a Mary Sue. But then I realized, SO WHAT?

It doesn’t change the fact that Nancy Drew shaped me and thought me to be brave and inspired me to learn more and read more. If being a Mary Sue means being a good role model to kids, I’ll say her character did a pretty good job (as expected of her lol). I mean, I didn’t turn out to be like her (because…it’s impossible) but I grew up trying to be. And It’s not really a bad thing because I became a responsible kid who believes that to be Nancy Drew, I must possess knowledge and to have that, I should study well and read whatever and whenever I can.

She may not be the best female character ever written, but I can’t hate her. She’ll always be one of my favorites.

But before I end this, when we think about it…isn’t her character’s perfection her ultimate flaw? And with that flaw may be the reason why I love her? wat.

*EXPLOSION* I should have paid attention to my philosophy classes.

Highway Story Time

Something happened today. I was on my way to school to enroll. I left the house extra early because I had to go back before 11:30 for Aldub (that’s what I’ve been saying to everyone). It was a normal day. People came in and got off that jeepney. Until that ride stopped for an old man. And as he was crossing the street, a motorcycle came rushing out of nowhere and hit him. He flew right underneath the front wheel of another jeepney behind us. The jeep was able to stop at the second though so the old man’s body wasn’t crushed entirely.

The view behind us was awful. I can only see his feet, which was already swollen. The driver told us that he was planning to check the old man’s upper body but backed out when the people said it was horribly crushed.

After that people had to move on with their lives. But all throughout that ride, everyone had something to say. I felt bad for our driver though. He was pretty shaken. He kept brushing his arms and spitting at the window.I was riding shotgun so I can hear him mumbling regrets like, “If I didn’t stopped for that guy, he wouldn’t get hit and he wouldn’t be dead.”

I love gore films. But damn, when you actually see them in real life, fuck.

The Final Evaluation

So it’s official. I am now off duty for the final semester of my academic life. For those of you who do not know, which is understandable because I don’t talk about it much, I’ve been a student assistant for 3 and half years.

In those years, I made use of my vacant hours by attending student assistant duties like  walking around the campus to ask for signatures, answering phone calls, cutting and stapling documents, delivering stuff, posting announcements on bulletin boards and filing communications.

And I am forever grateful for that because it helped my family financially since I am majoring in such an expensive course. But this semester, my parents decided that I should lay low for a bit since I’m graduating. I was having second thoughts because I know how much advantage being a scholar is. But then again, I don’t think I can commit to attending more duty hours as often as I used to because of having other stuff to do.

My last days on duty was weird because I suddenly realized how much I’m gonna miss the office when I leave. It occurred to me how much attached I was to the experience that I almost didn’t want to go. Of course I don’t talk much inside the office. I don’t really socialize a lot with the volunteers and the staff there. I only speak when I’m spoken to.

But I will definitely miss my table, the most comforting corner I ever had. This is where I sit most of the time and write drafts for my blog entries. The paper cutter and the photocopy machine, two instruments in the office that I have mastered to operate in almost perfection. The ragged outgoing log book that I carried around. Of course, the sexual tension between me and the wall clock whenever I’m waiting for my time out.

I’m gonna miss having reasons to walk around the campus. I’m gonna miss the staff and the volunteers for being really nice and having the patience of talking to me despite of my shyness.

I love the office so much. No, I’m not just saying that to give them a good name. I really do love it. Every semester student assistants have to answer this evaluation form for the office that they worked for. And I always give the same answer (and no, it’s not because I’m too lazy to come up with other answers). If I were to choose other offices to work for, what would it be? I won’t.

I wouldn’t change it for the world.